 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
That's right, it's almost time for Fred Thompson to wade into the political scene and send home all the girly men and masculine women.
Soon after the Labor Day weekend Mr. Thompson will give a speech that will make the leftists cry and the MSM wet its collective pants. In fact, Mr. Thompson—not yet an official candidate—has the left so worried they are already engaged in a massive disinformation campaign about him ranging from whether he supports tax reform (he does) to allegations that he dumped his first wife for a "trophy wife" (he met his second wife years after his relationship with his first wife ended).
I don't think the left realizes they have already lost.
Truths about Fred Thompson:
AWESOME FACTS ABOUT FRED THOMPSON
* Fred Thompson has on multiple occasions pronounced "nuclear" correctly.
* Fred Thompson has blasted more people in the face with a shotgun than even Dick Cheney.
He's Fred Thompson. You're nothing.
* The masked executioner of Saddam Hussein: Fred Thompson.
* Not only does Fred Thompson cut taxes, he cuts tax collectors.
* Fred Thompson is the only person to have ever bested Miyamato Mushashi in a duel. The reason Musashi is so vague about the book of the void is because the fifth ring of combat is really Fred Thompson.
* The reason Fred Thompson didn't want to stay in the Senate for long is because all the extra scrutiny kept him from doing his favorite hobby: Prowling the streets at night killing drug dealers.
* Every night before going to sleep, Osama bin Laden checks under his bed for Fred Thompson.
* Fred Thompson took over what was Al Gore's Senate seat, thereby dramatically reducing the Senate's carbon footprint. Fred Thompson then created carbon offset offsets by wastefully burning hippies.
* The Fremen consider "Fred Thompson" a killing word.
* Fred Thompson reconsidered running for reelection after 9/11 but later decided to handle things on his own. He was soon seen entering the Middle East with a bottle of tequila in one hand an a handgun in the other. They're still counting the dead.
* Though Fred Thompson left the Senate in 2003, Harry Reid still hasn't stopped wetting his pants.
* Fred Thompson's gaze can kill small animals.
* Fred Thompson once ended a filibuster by ripping out a Senator's heart and showing it to him before he died.
* The actual cause of global warming: Fred Thompson's burning rage.
* The budget to Law & Order was dramatically increased when Fred Thompson was added to the cast because he has to be digitally inserted into the scenes since anytime he's near Hollywood liberals, he kills them.
* Only two things can kill Superman: Kryptonite and Fred Thompson.
* Fred Thompson once stood on our south border and glared at Mexico. There was no illegal immigration for a month.
* Scientists predict that when Fred Thompson dies he'll explode taking out the five nearest planets before collapsing into a black hole.
* At a campaign stop, a Belgian Hound tried to hump Fred Thompson's leg. That breed of dog no longer exists.
* Fred Thompson vows not only to win in Iraq but also to forcefully free Vietnam from Communism, thus giving America a perfect win/loss record for wars again.
* If you purchase a weather radio, it will wake you up with an alarm to warn you when Fred Thompson is pissed off.
* An abortion doctor tried to kill Fred Thompson when he was still in the womb, but he cut off the man's hand with scalpel while shouting, "Do you know who I am? I'm Fred Thompson!"
* Webster's Dictionary defines "conservatism" as "how closely one's views resemble those of Fred Thompson."
* Fred Thompson's sense of strategy is so great that he can checkmate you using only a pawn and a knight.
* Fred Thompson can know both the exact position and momentum of a particle. Furthermore, he knows Schroedinger's cat is dead because he personally strangled it.
* The most efficient airline security is to have Fred Thompson stare down everyone entering a plane.
* When terrorists get to the afterlife, they'll find that none of their seventy-two women are still virgins. Why? Because of Fred Thompson.
* Fred Thompson can open clamshell packaging without the slightest trouble.
* In a butterfly ballot, no matter where you punch it the vote goes to Fred Thompson.
* Why does Iran want nuclear weapons? Out of fear of Fred Thompson.
* Some versions of the Bible have Mathew 5:5 read, "Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth... unless Fred Thompson wants it."
* Fred Thompson gets three scoops of raisins in every box of Kellogg's Raisin Bran.
* Every time Fred Thompson's PC crashes, Bill Gates calls him and apologizes.
* Ways to kill a vampire:
1. Sunlight.
2. Stake through the heart.
3. Tell Fred Thompson that the vampire called him a sissy.
* Cars should stop and look both ways for Fred Thompson before driving through a crosswalk.
* Harry Reid once got a black eye from a memory of Fred Thompson.
* The lobby scene in The Matrix is loosely based on final poll results from Fred Thompson's reelection to the Senate.
* Warning on cars' side view mirrors: "Objects in the mirror are closer than they appear, and if you can even glimpse Fred Thompson, you're already dead."
* Fred Thompson promises that his foreign policy will be like a good action movie: Full of cool one-liners and explosions.
* Fred Thompson can pickpocket a ninja.
* The real reason Communism collapsed: they heard Fred Thompson was leaving acting to become a politician.
More Fred Facts
Current Mood : amused 
Tags : fred thompson
Location : Home
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
I hear lots of Whoot! Whoot! but if you want to win the dispirited Republicans I've been talking to over the course of the past few months (yes, believe it or not I am a registered Republican who actually donates money to my local party committee and turns out to do things like volunteer at the GOP booth at county fairs in one of the most hardcore Democratic counties in America) you going to have to tell me his position on actual policy issues like abortion, government spending and any number of other conservative issues. Even though the debacle that constituted the 2006 congressional elections was primarily about one issue--the war--there is a great deal of merit to the argument that a contributing factor was the fact that the GOP has completely abandoned its traditional platform of limited government, states rights, low taxes and fiscal responsibility. I was alive when a great Republican said "I have little interest in streamlining government or in making it more efficient, for I mean to reduce its size. I do not undertake to promote welfare, for I propose to extend freedom. My aim is not to pass laws, but to repeal them. It is not to inaugurate new programs, but to cancel old ones that do violence to the Constitution, or have failed their purpose, or that impose on the people an unwarranted financial burden. I will not attempt to discover whether legislation is ‘needed’ before I have first determined whether it is constitutionally permissible. And if I should be attacked for neglecting my constituents’ ‘interests,’ I shall reply that I was informed that their main interest is liberty, and in that cause I am doing the very best I can." I was too young to understand what was at stake when Barry Goldwater ran against Lyndon Johnson, but I remember how he was portrayed as a war-mongering racist throw back to the 19th century and I have lived through the consequences. Today I understand what Goldwater represented. Except for that brief moment when Ronald Reagan talked the talk (but didn't quite walk the walk) the GOP has abandoned everything Goldwater stood for. Mitt Romney is no Barry Goldwater, Rudy Giuliani is no Barry Goldwater, John McCain (a truly tragic figure) is no Barry Goldwater and Lord knows Fred Thompson couldn't even play him on TV. Give me a candidate who walks, talks and votes like Barry Goldwater and I'll give you a Republican party that can truly build a shining city on a hill. Till, then I hope your ready for Clinton II. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
It doesn't matter what other people say about Fred Thompson. Really. All that matters is what Fred Thompson says about Fred Thompson. Fred on taxes. Fred on Iran. Fred on foreign affairs. Fred on everything. People who oppose or merely question Fred should not rely on what others say about him. Indeed, one of his greatest positives is the amount and source of hatred he has generated amongst the left. They see it as another chance to try and vent their still-lingering hatred of Ronald Reagan. Another chance to try and rewrite the history of the Reagan Era. |
|
|
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
Previous entries